fashion

MY 300TH POST... A REFLECTION

January 08, 2018

300 posts and five and a half years. I can't believe that I've sat down to write three hundred of these. What can happen in 300 posts? To commemorate this milestone (that really crept up on me), I'm going to relay the history of this blog and reflect on how I've grown. As if the New Year doesn't make me existential enough, this will be a trip for SURE.


Technically, I've been blogging since I could get on the internet. I used to spend my nights in middle school on the home computer looking up how to publish a book for free. Nowadays, that's simple. You can publish an e-book. In 2004, things weren't as accessible. I was also 9 years old and had no idea what I was doing. I also didn't have a manuscript written or anything. I just wanted to write and be heard. 

The wanting to write and be heard part hasn't changed at all.  I'm writing now still, right? I definitely still want to be heard, and I don't think that will ever change. When I started refining my writing skills more and more in high school, and realized that you could make a living from the internet, I got back into blogging. I was also going through a Tumblr phase with the rest of my generation, so I started my first blog: "Freedom of Expression" on there.  Looking back, I cringe at overly curly script fonts and screenshots reflecting an old iPhone iOS as legit pictures on the blog. It was a fun, creative outlet for me to spout opinions on topics I pretended that I knew everything about, however. See what else hasn't changed?


For a long time, I tried to be a fashion and lifestyle blogger. I now cringe at my old outfits even more than the graphic design of the site. I miss the blissfully ignorant days of this site. I didn't pour over analytics. I truly couldn't tell you what I even had for readership (if any). I was just happy to do it. In 2013, I switched to blogger, because I could tell that I could be more comfortable customizing on this platform. At the time, the site was pretty standard for blogging. 

I would call 2014-2015 my most active year. I was posting weekly if not biweekly. I was going HARD in Facebook groups and racking up UMVs in the thousands. Then, college got extremely busy. I don't regret dropping off, because I wouldn't be where I am today if I didn't double-down on school. Currently, my goal is to get back to where I was, if not better.

I've changed a LOT, to quote DJ Khaled, since I started blogging. On paper, my life is "together". I'm supporting myself and am finally pursuing things that I'm interested in. I grew up in a time where people where taught to go with the status quo, get a job and a white picket fence. I always wanted to do something greater, but those people who rose to stardom were seen a "disruptors". As a woman I was taught in society to be seen and not heard. How could I be disruptive?


Where and when I was brought up, it was also not made a normal thing to be to be introspective with myself and constantly check in on my feelings. I was used to always saying I was fine, so much so that I said an abusive relationship was "fine" and "good" for two years. Now, I'm constantly thinking about what I can do to progress. How I can grow and change is constantly on my mind. When I think of something, I don't let it simmer for too long. I just do it. If something makes me unhappy, I stop and I think about why it makes me feel that way. I'm constantly checking in on myself.

Blogging has been there for every change since 2012. They've seen my go through the changes - the clothing, the thoughts and even the writing styles. It's an online time capsule in a way. It's always been a constant for me. I don't mind change - I would actually call myself a fan. It's important to always have constants, however, and blogging has been a constant for me. Here's to many more years!





blogging

Lifestyle: A MODEST PROPOSAL FOR NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

January 05, 2014



   pictures from weheartit.com

Happy New years my lovelies! I hope you all had a great night to end the old year and ring in the new years. I hope you all surrounded yourselves with people you love and that make you happy. That’s what we all should be doing this year, maybe we can all make that a resolution to ourselves of some sorts.
Let’s talk about resolutions and why they get bad reps. Everyone always promises a new “self” for themselves in the new year. Everyone suddenly has a new lease on life. Sure, new years is a great time for renewal. It’s that way in the calendar year as well as the church. Perhaps we’re making these resolutions to ourselves for the wrong reasons, and that’s why so many people fail. Maybe that’s why you have fight for a treadmill on Jan 1, but by Jan 30 it’s a ghost town at the gym. People make these “resolutions” so that they can be as pretty as Kendall Jenner, so that they can get the guy they’ve been fawning over, so that they can like what they see in the mirror. All of those things can be achieved with a simple change of mind, except for the Kendall Jenner part, that’s basically saying you want to be as pretty as photoshop. 
picture from instagram.com/jacvanek

I say we resolve these resolutions a little bit. I want to make two modifications to our New years tradition. It’s almost like “A Modest Proposal” by Jonathan Swift, except no children will be harmed. First, those who promise themselves to shed some weight to look at it differently. You can lose weight by getting a haircut. You can only change the way your body looks by changing your lifestyle and mindset. You can set goals to drop pounds, however you can improve the results of how you look by focusing on certain body parts. Instead of saying, “I want to get rid of my fat legs,” say I want to have lean, long, and toned legs for days. Then, do workouts for your quads, calves, and inner thighs. Instead of saying “I want to loose my belly pooch,” say you want to strive for a strong core. Pilates is great for the core, your abs will be showing off in no time. Also, instead of complaining about your “fat ass” start squatting to lift that booty up! What I’m proposing is don’t become a cardio bunny - those people that stay on the elliptical for hours at the gym and don’t work any muscle groups. Yes, that gets your heart pumping and sweating is always great, but take days to focus on tightening those muscles so you can actually have the tone and fit body you want.
Another part to that proposal is to switch your mindset. We should make these new years resolutions for ourselves. You are the only person you need to impress. Yes, it feels great for friends, family, coworkers, and significant others to notice your success, however feeling proud of yourself and your success must be the best feeling out there. Saying “I DID IT!,” must warm your heart. Strive for that feeling. Once you feel that, the boy, the promotion, and the Kendall Jenner-ness will come soon after.
One final proposal is to change the name of this. “Resolution” is a fine word, however there is so much pressure attached to it. It sounds like there is no wiggle room, no room for cheat days. Our SOUL needs to be fed, too, that’s why there are cheat days. I say instead of resolutions we refer to them as promises to ourselves. “I promise to finally be happy with my body and feel fit, and therefore feel happy,” we should say instead of, “My resolution is to lose 50 pounds.” Promising yourself a better you (even though you are already amazing) is the first step to body and mind positivity and the first step to success. Resolving to yourself to lose a random amount of weight for someone who might not even notice is the first step to failure.
And now, I’ll end with my own promises and goals. It’s always important to set some goals, whether it be professionally, emotionally, creatively, socially, or spiritually as well. My promises to myself is to stop being such a living, breathing doormat and to stand up for myself more. To make myself heard and to know what I want. Basically stop teeter tottering and get my act straight. I also don’t want to plateau and keep aiming towards a fit figure.

My goals are to make deans list again for the two semesters that are in 2014 and to start making a greater profit from my blog. I want to actually see where all this blogging is taking me and if I can handle my own business someday. Let’s make things happen!

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